Sometimes I wish I was gay.

Not me.

Every now and then, when I talk to women, I offend them unintentionally by saying something slightly explicit, and drama ensues. It annoys me to no end that girls tend to think they should have the right to judge my sexual preferences and that my opinion of what I find attractive in, say, female attire, is in some way degrading to the whole of female kind. OK, so I have a thing for school uniforms, and, in my opinion, if a girl is trying to pick up a new boyfriend, something like that would work fairly well, as opposed to "don't look at my body" clothes. (Note here that I've never tried to pressure anyone into wearing a school uniform.) I've had this argument with several former female friends, and they seem to think it's a porn-induced fetish. They couldn't be more wrong, of course. It's not even a fetish for me, I just think it's cute and a bit of a turn on. It's just that if I should mention something like that, the whole conversation blows up in my face, and you know that's pretty crappy in a bar full of people. Sometimes it's the girl I'm talking to, and I wonder why she asked my advise in the first place, or it can be her cockblocker friend going all mental.

I know the above sounds quite specific, but I'm only using it as an example, as it was the first time I realized I wish I was gay.

Would gay life be easier? Well, I know a lot of gay guys, both swishy, feminine types and big hairy macho types, and even a few hardcore leather men. What they have in common, though, is that they're all pretty cool and very open about what the like and also very accepting of others. Unlike most women I've met. (I know they are out there, it's just that I hardly ever meet them and click). Also, with my body type and clothes preference (and friend preference), I'd land smack in the middle of bear territory. I stated above, that the guy in the photo wasn't me, but I can assure you that he and I have a lot in common. It's amusing to find a photo of someone who looks that much like myself! But I digress. The point is, that if I was a bear, most of the drama would be eliminated. If a bear asks you "does my butt look big in this?", a positive answer might even lead to nookie! And a quickie is fine! There is no faking orgasms, no question as to the satisfaction of your work, and playfighting can be damned good foreplay. And dressing up to go out on a pisser is putting on pants and a clean shirt. Life would be so easy.